Choices

I had an interesting experience today. I made the choice to be miserable. I allowed something to set me off and then one thing after another happened to add to my misery. I remembered a quote I heard, and I did a google search to find the exact quote...

"Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be."
~Abraham Lincoln~

As I thought about that quote, and the truth it holds, I literally made the decision that I was not ready to be happy. I wanted to cry and pout and be miserable, just a little longer. It was kind of a strange feeling. I had control and I CHOSE to be unhappy...why?...

The other day someone told me they could sense that I was depressed. I hadn't felt depressed, at least not for a while, but the idea was placed in my head. Then Friday I was introduced to a blog that was hilarious! I was laughing so hard I started to cry. As I was laughing there came brief moments where I would almost give in to the crying and felt like sobbing! Why would I feel that way? I was laughing! It was funny! Why did I feel like giving in and sobbing?!? It didn't make any sense. Then, on Saturday something happened and I got upset, but the day ended pretty well, and today I allowed something small to get to me, and that caused an avalanche of emotions and one thing after another just piled up until I was so upset I could hardly function. It might have been ok if I didn't have anywhere to go, but my choice to be miserable was more public than I would have preferred. I just kept apologizing to people for having a crappy attitude and did my best to keep it together when I needed to the most.

What have I gotten for my crying? Burning eyes. My eyes just burn and I want to go to sleep. I'm sure I will feel better tomorrow. In fact, I CHOOSE to be happy...tomorrow. Lif'e full of choices and hopefully my letting loose today will make the right choice easier tomorrow.

Don't worry, be happy!